Thursday, March 30, 2006

Living Person

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Sorry folks! At the moment I am a fully living person, not a columnist! (See Scribo ergo Sum)

Monday, March 27, 2006

Doonesbury

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I'd like to introduce you to Doonesbury, consistently the best comic strip commenting on American politics and daily life.
See for yourself!

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Lipstick Indicator

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Economists very seriously predict a recession by looking at the Lipstick Indicator. Leonard Lauder (son of Estée) discovered that in times of economic duress the sale of lipstick goes up.
The reason, supposedly, is that women need to catch a man, who will take them through the rough tides.
Plausible.
Our animal instincts are after all only skin deep.
Lip skin deep.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Het Goede Nieuws

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Het goede nieuws is dat er ook mensen zijn als Elena Simons van stichting WONDER, die op het idee komt om na de moord op Theo van Gogh sinterklaascadeautjes in de schoenen van biddende moslims te stoppen.
Die met bijstandsgerechtigden in Bloemendaal langs de deuren gaat om de rijke bewoners te bedanken voor hun belastinggeld, dat de uitkeringen betaalt.

Het goede nieuws is dat homo's en moslims samen een potje vriendschappelijk voetbal spelen.

Het goede nieuws is dat er nog mensen zijn die de wereld van de andere kant durven bezien.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Fig Semi-Fredo or Parfait

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I like quick and easy recipes with a pretense of chic!
For a time I have been looking for an icecream that does not need to be stirred while it is getting frozen. I realized it needed to be rich in fats to crowd out the water cristals. Jamie Oliver finally gave me the answer.
We had it yesterday and it absolutely came up trumps! We had it with dried figs, but any experimenting is possible with the basic recipe.
Easy? Dead easy!

Separate 4 large eggs. Beat the yokes with 50 grams of sugar until pale and foamy. Beat 500 ml double cream to a soft peak stage, but no further. Beat the egg whites very stiff with a pinch of salt in a very clean bowl. (Wipe with vinegary paper towel to degrease!)
Have ready: 400 grams of dried figs (I soaked them a little in warm water to soften them.) and three tablespoons of honey, pulsed together in the food processor.
Mix all ingredients together as gently as possible. Freeze.
Take out of the freezer into the fridge in time to make the parfait pliable.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Wouter Bos

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Allochtonen opgepast!
Met zijn opmerking over brokkenmakende raadslieden is de heer Wouter Bos het niveau van de missionaris en zijn zwartjes nog niet ontstegen!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Er Doorheen

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Zo!

Ik ben er
weer helemaal
doorheen
voor het moment.

Even wachten
op nieuwe
aan-, uit-, of in-
vallen.

(Kijk!
Zo wordt
iedere uitspraak
poëzie.)

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Scribo Ergo Sum

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A columnist writes to prove he exists. We are witnesses of his life. We learn where he had dinner and what he ate, what new sports he is learning and whom he met in the street on his way to the grocery store.
We learn at a deeper level that he has friends, that he is a sports type and that he does his own shopping in the neighbourhood.
But most of all we learn that he thinks. That he has thoughts and ideas about life. Being able to express them makes him fully alive. We see him cogitare ergo esse loud and clear.

However, writing and living cannot be done simultaneously. To write is to suspend life for the time needed to put one’s experiences on paper. While recording the day’s vicissitudes the act of living is on hold.
So: to be fully alive takes up too much time to allow one to record the daily happenings. But to attest of one’s existence one needs written proof.
Writing is not living. Yet to write is to exist.
What a paradox!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Swede and Cabbage

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P.was surprised at the tastefulness of this combination!

Peel and dice a small swede. Blanch in boiling water for two minutes. Drain for 20 minutes to dry.
Heat some nutty oil in a wok and stirfry the swede until brown and caramilized. Add a small shredded (Savoy) cabbage. Keep stirring until the swede is soft and the cabbage still al dente.
Serve with toasted nuts (wal- or pine) and a generous amount of strong (=old) Gouda or Cheddar cheese.
I served it with millet, which was a bit dry, so a drizzle of nutty oil or butter will set that right.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Playing with Food

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Someone is playing games with our dog, Tazi. Games with his enormous appetite for food. He does not just like it; he loves and adores it, craves it, goes crazy about it. So someone has decided to play hide and seek with food: I hide, you seek, and your owners try to prevent the fun altogether, so you’d better be quick.
Who this person is, is unclear. Is it a person who wants Tazi to find the sandwiches and half-torn bags of crisps, or is it a teaser who mocks his craving?
Sometimes the sport is fun. A schoolboy’s packed lunch is hidden in a crevice of a wall. So Tazi needs to scrape with his paws and nuzzle with his snout to claw the goodie bag out. The only real challenge is to eat it before the mistress has arrived on the spot. Piece of cake.
At other times the game is mean. One time it must have been a nasty cat who hid the bread. She had hung slices of it on some branches of the trees.
Tazi went wild! He knew the bread was there. But however frantically he ran around the area where he could smell it, he could not catch it.
Mean. Mean.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Communication

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"And I say, if people réally cannot communicate, the very least they can do is SHUT UP"

Tom Lehrer

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Juffrouw Smid

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Juffrouw Smid woonde in “de vier woningen.” Dit was een huis als een klassieke boerderij: een grondverdieping en daarop een laag puntdak waaronder nog kleine kamertjes.
Het zou ruim zijn voor een normaal gezin, maar het was niet één woning, het waren er vier: twee voor, twee achter. Lage vertrekken, een pomp achter het huis. Het huis zelf was mooi; het staat inmiddels op de monumentenlijst. Maar comfort had het toen niet.
Het lag aan de rand van het bos. Ernaast liep het “wasvrouwenlaantje”. Waarom dat zo heette weet ik niet meer, maar ik kan er van alles bij verzinnen.
Juffrouw Smid heette niet juffrouw Smid, omdat ze nooit getrouwd was geweest. Dat was ze wel degelijk, met meneer Smid, die allang overleden was. Ze heette zo, omdat ze van een lagere klasse was. Wij kinderen vonden dat raar, maar zelf vond ze dat heel gewoon.
Ze was van oorsprong Duitse, en sprak dan ook met een zwaar accent. Ze liep behoorlijk mank. Dag in, dag uit zagen we haar voorbij hobbelen, op weg naar de bushalte. Eén uur: “Kijk, daar gaat juffrouw Smid.”
Zo nu en dan kwam ze bij ons aan de achterdeur. Net als de schillenboer, en de tuinman. Ik geloof dat ze wat extra huishoudelijk werk deed. Ik herinner me haar, zittend op de hooikist in de keuken, met een kopje koffie, kakelend als een kraai.
Ze kwam uit een ander tijdperk, dat snel bezig was voorbij te gaan.
Dat het toen nog bestond, verbaast me eigenlijk.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Sense of Humor

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In dating desires both men and women indicate that a sense of humor is very important in a potential partner. The profiles that people present make that very clear.

Women are looking for a partner who makes them laugh.
Men prefer women who laugh at their jokes.

Well, that's perfect then, isn't it!

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Auto Ongeluk

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Mama neuriet. Haar haren dansen vóór me op het wiegen van de auto. Mijn voeten wippen op en neer in het stoeltje.
Vrachtwagens glijden langzaam vlakbij. Grote wielen langs het raam. Ze sproeien druppels. Ze komen dichterbij. Een douche van water kletst tegen de ruit. De wielen gaan niet weg. Ze rollen alsmaar door. Rollen. Rollen.
Ga weg, wielen!
Ze sproeien douchewater. Al maar ronddraaiend water in stromen over de ruit. Rollend water dat niet weg gaat.
De wielen komen boven haar haren. Als reuzen. De voorruit barst spattend open met de wielen erin. Haar haren zwermen door de lucht in een krans. Mijn keel krijst in mijn oren. Het kraakt en slingert.
Ik gil.
Zuurscherp prikt de rook van duizend lucifers in mijn neus en in mijn ogen.
Het wielenmonster verbrijzelt alles.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Making Shortcrust Cookies with the Children

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The girl (8 years old) weighed the ingredients:

200 grams of flour, 100 grams of sugar, 150 grams of butter, a pinch of salt.

She cut the butter into the mixture with two knives and then started rubbing the course dough between her thumbs and her fingers. When the dough began to hang together she started kneading. Two mini splashes of cold water were needed to make it into one ball. Then the dough was divided into three parts, and the boys (5 and 2) were each given one as well.

They expertly rolled it out onto a placemat, using a little flour to avoid sticking. They took turns with the rolling pin. Then they cut out the cookies: stars and half-moons and ducks and bells. They rolled them back into a ball and started again. They made snakes and piled them one upon another.

Eventually there were two greased cookies sheets full of their creations.

These were baked for 15 minutes in a pre-heated 175 º C oven, and allowed to cool before they were tasted.

They were delicious, simply delicious! We had one cookie, and then another.

But best of all were the half-moon smiles on the faces of the children!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

The Literacy of George W. Bush

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George W. Bush knows seven words: six nouns and one personal pronoun.

The nouns are: Democracy, Freedom, Country, God, War, Terrorism.
The personal pronoun is: Our.

The pronoun may be used in front of any of the nouns:

Our Democracy.
Our Freedom.
Our Country.
Our God.
Our War.
Our Terrorism

Wednesday, March 01, 2006